How to Worship As a Family (Simple Guide)
By Ralph Mullenax
Family worship is integral to Christian life. It offers moments of praise, thanksgiving, and connection with God amidst life's challenges. It can be simple: read a Bible passage, sing a hymn, and pray. Though uncomplicated, this practice fosters spiritual growth, facilitates discussions, and helps to instill faith in our children.
Introduction
Imagine yourself standing on a hilltop in the early evening. Before you are the tents of the families of Israel. Over the droning sound of crickets, you hear the joyful sound of praying and singing; families praising Yahweh. This is the image painted for us in Psalm 118:15: “The voice of rejoicing and salvation is in the tents of the righteous.”
First and foremost, as Christians, we desire to worship at home with our families because we rejoice in our salvation. The mercies of God move us to praise and motivate us to thanksgiving. Family worship isn’t meant to check off a box on a holiness checklist. It’s a constant place of meeting when things are going well, when people are sick, when new opportunities are on the horizon, when loved ones die, when siblings fight, when babies are born, and all the ups and downs of life. It’s the humble bringing of our families to Jesus knowing that in him we live and move and have our being.
So Why Is Family Worship So Difficult?
It really doesn’t need to be. It’s easy to come up with excuses that get in the way: life gets busy, we don’t know what to do or where to start, the kids are too young, it would be awkward to start now after going so long without it, we’ve tried in the past but it fizzled out, and many more. Often these excuses seem credible not because of what family worship is but what we think it should be.
We should have a high view of family worship without having too high a view of our family worship. God is good and has blessed us beyond measure. It’s impossible to find something more important than rendering worship to God. At the same time, you’re in the living room with a fussy baby. The in-laws pull up in the driveway unexpectedly. Someone really has to use the bathroom. The baseball game ran late. The power is out.
When we have too high a view of the way we think our family worship should go, these events will cause frustration and leave us disillusioned. It could cause our tempers to rise and before you know it, we want to yell at people to just sit down and be quiet. “We’re trying to worship the Lord!” After all, could there be anything more important?
Keep It Simple
As I’m writing this, I asked my wife how long we’ve been doing family worship. We can’t remember. Our oldest is 14 so we know it isn’t longer than that. When I started family worship for our family, I caught wind of one essential piece of advice. It’s what has kept it going all these years. Here it is: Keep it simple. We actually don’t even call it “family worship.” At our house, every night before bed, we have “Sing and Pray.”
The Elements of Family Worship
If you don’t know what to do, this is it:
Read something
Sing something
Pray
It doesn’t need to be overly planned out and it doesn’t need to involve a systematic theology textbook.
Read Something
We pick a book of the Bible and we read from it. We’ve read through numerous books of the Bible as a family. For the past couple years we’ve been making our way through 1 and 2 Samuel and 1 Kings. We’re currently halfway through 2 Kings.
Sometimes the family is very engaged in the story. Those nights we might get a whole chapter out. Other times we might just do a couple paragraphs. The headings in your Bible are your friend. Just read between the headings.
Don’t feel like you can’t read from the Bible because your kids are too little. You speak to them as a newborn and they don’t understand a single word but over time, they learn to speak because you spoke to them. When we read the Bible to our kids, even if they can’t really understand, we’re teaching them to read the Bible.
Sing Something
We have about 10 hymns or psalms that we know as a family. I have 4 kids and they take turns picking what song we’ll sing. Each night, in age order, I ask “What song do you want to sing tonight?” My oldest (14) loves to sing “Leave it There” (an old Gospel hymn by Charles Albert Tindley). My youngest (8) loves “Holy, Holy, Holy.” We can add about 5 more around Christmas. Sometimes we just sing “Jesus Loves Me.”
You could pick a favorite hymn from church and learn it over the course of a week. When our kids were really little, we would teach them new songs. “My Hope Is Built On Nothing Less,” “Father, We Thank Thee For the Night,” “Rock of Ages,” and more.
Pray
This is a great part of family worship. There are occasions where you don’t have much to pray about. There are also occasions where there’s a very pressing matter that needs prayer. Either way, having the space already carved out means prayer will happen.
Some nights I’ll just pray a short prayer: “Father, thank you for such a wonderful day. We’re grateful for our neighbors, our family, and home. Keep us safe as we sleep tonight and help us get the rest we need to serve you tomorrow. In Jesus’ name. Amen.” Other nights we’ll go around the room and each person can pray for something that’s on their mind. This is a great time to model prayer for your family. It’s also a great way to see God answer the prayers of your family and grow your faith.
Family Worship Is A Blessing
This time with your family will be a blessing to them now and when they’re grown. It provides a fixed opportunity for your kids to ask questions about God, the Bible, and life. Reading steadily through a book of the Bible is bound to bring up all sorts of questions and things to talk about. There’s no better jumping off point than the Bible for discussions about sin, death, jealousy, sex, abuse of power, righteousness, marriage, anger, good government, compassion, unfaithfulness, joy, and a host of other topics.
Reading together helps to show your family how to read the Bible and how to ask questions of the Bible. It helps to increase knowledge and familiarity with the scriptures. Singing together builds joy and confidence in the Lord. It gives your family something to sing or hum while they work and play. Praying together teaches your family that all the labor of the day is empty and vain without God. Our strength comes from Him. We need His guidance and His wisdom.
Some Other Helpful Tips
Here are some other tips to help you get started and keep going:
You will inevitably reach a point where family worship has stalled. If it’s been a week or a month since the last time, just jump back in! Pick up in the Bible where you last left off and get started again.
Did dinner run long at your parent’s house? Sing and pray in the car on the way home! This is a lifesaver during baseball season when we’re not getting home until 9 or 9:30 at night. It’s hard to read in the car but have everyone recite a Bible verse they have memorized! Or just skip reading and sing something and pray.
Have guests over and it’s time to put the kids to bed? Invite your guests to join! We’ve had family or friends over at bedtime. We tell them that we do “sing and pray” before bed and would love for them to join us.
Be joyful! Crabbiness in worship just teaches your family that Jesus makes Dad yell at them. There are funny names in the Bible. “Meshullemeth” (2 Kings 22:19) is what got the kids this week. There are great stories in the Bible! Sometimes I’ve been asked to re-read David and Goliath because the boys like that story. Go for it! Don’t forget the family in family worship.
Last, but certainly not least, learn to sing a version of the Lord’s Prayer. if you’re extremely pressed for time, it’s a Bible passage, a song, and a prayer wrapped into one!
There are surprises waiting for you and your family together in worship. You’ll create new inside jokes because of a misheard hymn lyric—we have! You’ll be convicted of a sin you committed and have a captive audience to repent and ask forgiveness. Your kids will ask incredibly insightful questions that show they were paying attention to the reading or will look at you and smile when the pastor reads something you’ve read together as a family that week.
Get started today, and may your neighbors hear the voice of rejoicing and salvation in your tent!
Family Worship Guide (PDF)
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